Why Sexism Doesn’t Always Matter

…my unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism or ageism or lookism or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: “Is this person in between me and what I want to do?” If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. - Tina Fey

How did Tina Fey become one of the most successful female comedy voices ever? By being really funny, yes. How did she do it in a male-dominated, overtly misogynist industry? By being relentlessly focused and strategic. And we can all learn from that.

Those of us from Fey’s generation can remember the days when people were most certainly not discussing gender equity in the workplace. In those days, you were sort of on your own. And that turns out to be a good thing—or at least a useful thing. You had no choice but to figure out a way to win in the face of the barbs and slights and aggressions (micro, macro, and otherwise) that would inevitably come.

You had to choose your battles, and let the rest roll off.

Which doesn’t mean that sexism doesn’t matter. It just means that it doesn’t always matter. What Fey is saying is to take a moment to understand whether the person doling out the sexism matters to your advancement. If so, then you need to deal with it head on. If not—if that person is just a jerk who has no influence over you, don’t spend an ounce of emotional energy on them. Just move on. To engage would be to waste your time, give them power they don’t deserve, and suck time you should be spending building your empire.

The point is to win the game. And the way to win the game is to stay relentlessly focused on your goals, not the foolishness of others.